My Story
by just-typing
Summary: Hermione realizes something important the day before her marriage. H/Hr mentions R/Hr. Minor AU. Follows most of cannon, except epilogue. Fred not dead.
1. My Story

Hermione's POV

Tomorrow is my wedding. They are calling it wedding of the Century. I am getting married to Mr. Ron Weasley. Tomorrow. But why am I telling you this? I have just realized something very important. I want to think logically about it, and what better way to do that than to talk with someone who cannot reply and let me think, right? So, I will start from the beginning. I am sure you know most of my story, so I will not bore you with the first six years of my Hogwarts life. But the next two years are very important to this story and my life. So I will concentrate more on that. May be I am wrong about my realization. I hope I am wrong (That's a first in my life). Why? Because I have just realized Harry potter is in love with me and I am marrying Ron tomorrow. And I don't know what I am feeling. Do I love harry or ron more? May be I will find out once I finish telling you this story, MY story.

While I am telling you my story, I will also try to correct some of the mistakes in the books. The books are accurate about most of the things. Some things are overly dramatized, like Harry potter finding gillyweed just an hour before second task in 4th year. We actually found it a week before and harry had tried it 3 times before the second task. Well, I understand that drama is required to sell the books. So I will not complain. But one thing I feel bad about is The books have not represented the dynamic between me, ron and harry in a proper way. I don't think it is possible to represent it here. But I will try to.

Ron is not just the joker of the group, though in the book he comes of like one. He has a good sense of humor and also bad sense of timing. But his table manners are not that bad. That's one part of Ron which is not represented in the book. The other part is We don't fight all that much. i.e. Ron and I, do not always bicker over everything. We do fight. Who doesn't? But it's not as much as in books. Let me tell you if someone fights with me so much, I'd tell goodbye to that person without second thought.

You are wondering which part of me is not represented correctly in book right? Yes, I am intelligent. You may even call me know it all. But I am not always logical. I do have my silly moments now and then. And also I am not all doom and gloom like in the book. I have fun, I crack jokes, I prank people and I laugh.

Now to Harry. It is very difficult to tell you what is not represented correctly about harry. One, he is not as moody as he comes off in the book. Yes, he gets angry. And yes, he has shouted at me and ron a fair few times, even when we weren't in the wrong. But he has come and apologized every single time. He had a lot to handle so we understood. And the other thing about harry that is not proper is, he is not as selfless as it is made out in the book. I mean he is the most selfless guy I know. But he has his limits. He calls it self-preservation, and I agree with him. But this part of him never came out in the books. Don't get me wrong. I know harry would never do something that will benefit him and harm others but he knows when to cut losses. Let me give you one or two examples so you understand my point better.

You all know our fourth year. It was the year in which Harry was entered in the tri-wizard tournament without his knowledge, which eventually led to the return of Lord Voldemort. You all also know that Ron and Harry had a fight just after Harry's name came out of the Goblet of Fire. And till first task they did not even talk to each other. That's true. But after the first, according to the book, they became best mates again, immediately. That's not true. After that event and whole through the year, Harry potter did not discuss anything important with Ron. We used to go to meals together. We used to hangout together. But when it came to the tournament preparation, Ron was out. It was only me and Harry. That is what Harry and I call as his self-preservation. Ron was and is very important to harry, but harry does take some time to forgive. And he was afraid to trust Ron again and go through the stress of fighting with his best friend.

Similar thing happened after our sixth year. He did not confide many things with me and Ron for most of the horcrux hunt. The most important being, he did not tell us that he had to die. He did not even meet us before going into the forest. He just told Nevile to kill the snake and took off. We do remain strong friends, but you disappoint Harry once, he will not be so fast to forgive you.

From the day Harry potter's name came out of the Goblet of Fire, I became the single most important person in his life. He always valued me more than Ron after that. Even now we both are very important to Harry. But if he has to pick one of us, he will pick me. And I am very happy about that.

Let us come to Ron. For Ron also I am more important. Obviously, I am his fiancée. So I am more important to him than his best mate.

But what about me? If I have a choice to pick between Ron and Harry, whom will I pick? This should be a fairly straight forward decision – I am supposed to pick my fiancé over my best friend. Simple. But just thinking of picking Ron over Harry doesn't seem right to me. I want to talk about this with someone. And I cannot talk to Ron. He jumps to conclusions very fast. And I am not in the mood for a fight before my wedding day. If harry was here, I would have gladly talked to him. He would listen and help me understand. But he is not here. Wait, didn't I tell you, Harry potter is NOT attending my wedding. Long story, I will get to it in a moment. Let me decide whom I will pick if I have to pick one of Ron and Harry. Can't decide. Ok. Let's get on with the story. May be when I finish telling what happened in the past year, I can decide whom to pick.

So the story…

Well, you all know what happened in the horcrux hunt. Me, Harry and Ron roamed all of England looking for soul fragments of voldemort. It was pretty much like it was described in the book. We found all came back to Hogwarts, destroyed them. There was no kiss with Ron that is pure fiction. Didn't happen. We are not foolish to start kissing in the middle of a war. So, Harry died, sort of. Came back. Fought and defeated the dark lord. And we won the war.

After that Me, Harry and Ron attended all the funerals for one week. We next went to Australia to get back my parents. It was such a great thing to have both of my best friends with me in times of need. And it also looked like Harry had finally put the war behind him and smiling a lot more. It was the time all three of us decided to become aurors. The auror training course was revamped. It was only one year instead of three like previous years. But the only problem was it started in January.

So we made a basic plan. We would take our NEWT's by attending Hogwarts. It was still last week of June. We had whole of July and August to relax. And we would attend Hogwarts from September till May. We will just roam around and try to settle down in the seven months from may to December, and January we will join auror training. Wow. Decisions reached. So joining auror training was one and half years away. I was very happy about this because it was my dream to be the head girl. Now it had a chance to be fulfilled. And Ron was happy because it just meant 18 more months of freedom. But Harry was not really happy to come back to Hogwarts. He said he had many ghosts there. But I knew he would come with us, just because we asked.

After that my parents came back with us to England. There were a lot of things wrong between the relationship between my parents and me. They could not believe that their daughter could do something as ruthless as making them forget their lives without their permission. So the one week spent in Australia and coming back to England and settling down were sort of peace offerings for my parents. They couldn't stay angry with me for very long. So things started looking better.

After coming back to England, my parents needed some time to get back to their old work and meet their old friends and acquaintances. So me, my parents, Ron, the Weasleys and Harry all stayed at the Grimmauld Place. Two days after we came back, all three of us got a letter from Minerva McGonagall, new Headmistress of Hogwarts, asking all three of us to meet her in the Hogwarts castle on 1st of August, one month before the start of school. I was very happy about this, as this meant that we are allowed to attend the school, even after missing one year.

So the remaining three weeks were just spent relaxing and enjoying. We had fallen into some sort of a routine. I would spend the mornings with my parents. And the afternoon me and Ron spent with the Weasleys . We both were Learning house hold spells, Harry was learning these in the morning because every afternoon Harry would spend time with my parents. Making them acquainted with the magical world. He was better at it than I was. And my parents liked him immensely. After that the evenings was trio time. We three, Harry, Ron and I would spend time together, just talking or playing chess. And the night after dinner was time for a walk. It was always only me and Harry. We would go to a nearby muggle park and come back. It was a time to talk about many things.

The most important thing that happened in this time was that Ron asked me to be his girl friend the day before we were supposed to meet the Headmistress. And obviously I said yes. I had been expecting this for some time. And after knowing each other for seven years, I did not feel the need to go on a few dates. We can always go on dates after being a couple, I thought. So after a few kisses we went to our respective rooms and slept. It was the next morning that we announced that we were together. It was a loud breakfast that morning. Everyone was excited about our trip to Hogwarts. So after eating breakfast, me and Ron stood up, held hands and announced that we are a couple now.

The reaction was more or less expected. All the Weasleys were very happy, and the twins even said "About time". My parents were not happy about my decision. I think that seeing their girl after a year and meeting her boyfriend in the same month is not easy, but they congratulated me. But the most unexpected response was from Harry. He never congratulated us. He simply said "Whatever makes you happy guys". I decided to talk to him about it that night. May be he was feeling left out. I wanted to reassure him that he will always be my best friend. Even with Ron as my boy friend I can't talk to him about some things, as Harry understood me better than Ron. So I was looking forward to our daily walk. But before that we had to go to Hogwarts and meet Minerva McGonagall. So we flooed to the Headmistress office to meet her.

"Good Morning, Professor" we greeted her. "Good Morning, Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley and Miss Granger, Please take a seat" she offered. Once we were seated, she started telling us about the choices we have to complete out NEWT's. "Because of the unfortunate circumstances in the last year, the whole year is declared null and void. Everyone will redo the same year they were supposed to be doing last year. That means you three are eligible to attend seventh year at Hogwarts. Are you interested?" She asked. "Yes mam" I answered for the three of us. "Then you will have to send me a letter stating that you are interested to attend by no later than seventh of august. On a personal note I am happy to have you three back" she concluded. But Harry had a question "If we are not coming, how will we complete NEWT's?" he asked. McGonagall said "The book list can be got and you can be home schooled. You can take the exam at the end of the year by paying the examination fee. However I do think you will enjoy this year, as we are planning on making you Mr. Potter and you Miss Granger as Head boy and Head Girl respectively."

I was very happy and looked at Harry's face. He was as happy as I was. But once he looked to Ron his expression changed. I thought something was wrong and looked at Ron, he was glaring at Harry. I decided to talk with Ron as soon as we reach Grimmauld Place, otherwise he would say something which he regrets later. So we left from Hogwarts and reached Grimmauld Place. As soon as we reached there everyone wanted to know what had happened and we became busy trying to explain things. And harry went to my parents room like usual and me and ron were with molly in the kitchen. I wanted to talk to both the boys privately about some things and it looked like I would not get a chance.

So I decided to talk to at least one of them that night. Like usual we meet in Harry's room where we would just relax in evenings. But today both of them were not in a position to relax. Ron was angry about harry getting the head boy position and harry was sad about something. Even though I was not able to guess what it was. So as soon as it was only three of us in the room Harry and Ron had a conversation. "I know you want the head boy position Ron. I can give it up and suggest you if you like" Harry said. "Thanks Harry. I knew you would understand. With me and Hermione being a couple, you would just be in the middle" Ron answered. It almost looked like a physical blow has struck Harry when Ron said those words. But Ron did not see it. I did. And I understood why Harry was unhappy. I was right in my assumption in the morning. So after dinner with the walk, I would clarify things to harry and later have some words with Ron about the tactless remarks.

After that everything was normal and we went to dinner. At dinner Ron announced that Harry did not want to be head boy as he would come between us and Ron would be the Head boy. Everyone was confused that someone would simply give up a head boy position but congratulated Ron. But I couldn't take it anymore. Ron was my boyfriend, but I can't tolerate him telling harry comes between us. I wanted to be Harry's friend. Ron may not have realized it but such comments hurt harry and the only thing he would do is draw away. I didn't want that. So I asked harry to wait for 10 minutes before walk and told Ron that I wanted to talk to him privately.

Everyone assumed that we were going to snog and teased us. But I was more worried about the trio's friendship so I didn't care about the teasing. I took Ron to my room put silencing spells on the door and started shouting at Ron. It became one of our worst fights. But finally I was able to convince Ron that it was his mistake to talk to harry that way. And he also agreed to apologize to harry the next morning. So I thought one quick kiss to ron and I will go meet harry and go for a walk. But Ron had other ideas. So our kisses almost lasted 15 minutes.

By the time I went downstairs, Harry was not there. But the twins were there. I asked them where harry was. Fred said "He went out for a walk, alone". I was angry, he was supposed to wait "But I asked him to wait for 10 min" I said. "That was about one and half hours ago" George said, "He even came to your room and knocked after waiting for one hour" Fred said. "But when you did not open the door, we said that you did not want to be disturbed, so he left" George said. I thought that it was a mistake to put the silencing charm on the door. But I was determined to talk to him. So I went to my room, kept the door open and laid down on the bed, waiting for Harry to come back. But I fell asleep. So I couldn't talk to that day. And that was my biggest mistake.

The next day my parents announced that they were ready to go back to the muggle world. But someone had to go and put the home in order. I wanted to do it. But I wanted Ron or Harry to come with me. But Harry offered to do it alone and my parents decided that was better. He was to stay in our home for a week and clean it and get it operational. I was not allowed to go as my parents wanted to spend more time with me. So Harry left that day itself. So all my plans of assuring harry that he was my closest friend got thrown out the window.

Harry came back after a week and announced that He was not attending Hogwarts. He wanted to he home schooled. And he just wanted to relax, and he wanted the Hogwarts memories as it was. He did not want to think of anyone else in what he thought was Dumbledore's place. I could not even force him to come, as the last day for sending the letter to Headmistress was already over. So I just had to accept that Harry was not coming back with us. I even entertained the thought of not going to Hogwarts and staying with harry and getting home schooled. But both Harry and Ron convinced me to attend Hogwarts. Ron promising lots of kisses and Harry promising lots of letters. Surprisingly Harry's letters meant more to me than Ron's kisses, but at that time I rationalized it because Harry was not coming to Hogwarts. I promised him that I will send him all my notes.

On September 1st Harry came to platform nine and three quarters to drop me, Ron and Ginny to the Hogwarts express. I never cried when I was coming to school. Even first year when I was coming for the first time. I knew I would miss my parents. But the excitement of attending the school was much more. But this year, seeing Harry on the platform waving us goodbye, I realized I will not be able to see him at least till Christmas. I couldn't stop crying for a solid 2 hours. Ron took care of all my duties in the train.

After I stopped crying, Ron tried to cheer me up by cracking some jokes. And then he tried to tease ginny. He asked her "So did Harry tell you why he didn't want to come to Hogwarts other than the reason he gave everybody?". Ginny was surprised "Why would he tell me something which he hasn't told you both? " she asked. "Because he is your boy friend" Ron answered rolling his eyes. Ginny started crying. "He wouldn't get together, no matter how many times I ask. He says he has moved on" she said in between sobs. I was shocked. I did not understand Harry's behaviour from the day we met the Headmistress. He was sad most of the time. And making decisions without consulting me and ron first. This was not his normal behaviour. Somehow Harry potter had changed from a best friend to an enigma in the matter of a month.

But one thing had not changed about harry. He would keep his promise to me no matter what. He would send me a letter every day and I would send him one back every evening. This proved to be a nice thing. Even though we were far away we still had lots of contact. It went on for two months. But after that I started getting only two letters per week and they were a lot more formal than what I was used to from harry. When I mentioned it to Ron, he said he sent a letter to harry telling that he was dominating most of my time and I was not even free to kiss him. So harry started sending fewer letters. But in the next letter I apologized for Ron's behavior and told Harry that Ron meant it as a joke. Harry did not send more letters but the letters he was sending became much larger and I was happy.

I wanted to go meet Harry for Christmas holidays. But Ron wanted to spend our Christmas holidays alone as a couple. I asked Harry what to do in a letter. He told me to stay in Hogwarts. He would join us for Hogwarts dinner. But Ron seemed to know this before me. So I was sure they were planning something. However I was happy to see Harry.

On the day of Christmas, Harry arrived. I couldn't stop my enthusiasm. I ran and Hugged him hard. I ran so fast that he was not able to balance me, and we both fell down. But I was happy and so was he. We both stayed in that position for a long time. Laughing like kids. Had Ron not come and pulled us off, we would have stayed like that whole day. Ron came gave Harry a hand and told "Glad you could be here for this mate". Suddenly Harry looked guilty for hugging me and went back and answered "Glad to be here". Looked like no one observed harry moving away from me. I did. And It hurt a lot. Harry never minded hugging me. We were the closest of friends. But now he was moving away from me and I don't know what for.

I told Harry "Fancy a walk tonight, Harry?", and he was very reluctant to answer, he said "Lets see tonight". But I was not ready to let him escape. I wanted to talk to him and I would do it. And the time before dinner was spent happily. Nothing could tone down my happiness today. Harry was here that made my day. For dinner, there was only one table as there were only few students. And just when it was about to be finished and I wanted to ask harry for a walk, Ron went down on his knee and proposed to me.

I never knew Ron could be so romantic. And I realized that I had started crying without knowing when. But I said yes. And there was a huge celebration. All the teachers and Harry and ginny congratulated us. And Harry now told Ron "I said she will say yes mate". Ron was smiling a broad smile just nodded. Harry came to me and said "I know you wanted to talk to me, but today is your day, enjoy. I also have an announcement to make." I was surprised. I was thinking that he has found a girl, that's why he had started writing less to me.

Harry raised his voice and said "Although it is not as big news as these two, I have an announcement." Everyone stopped talking. "I have a special dispensation from the Ministry of Magic to start my Auror training one year early. Only requirement is I have to complete my NEWT's this May" he announced. Everyone was happy, especially McGonagall. She was telling "I told you you'd make a good Auror didn't I?". But I was very sad. I thought at least after May harry would be with us. For seven months we could spend time together and next year we could go to the training together. Harry was still talking "I will start in six days. For the first 8 months, its just theory course. I can stay at home and learn. For the last 4 months, that is from September 1st I have to go to the Auror training center and stay there." I calculated. The maximum time I would get with him was June, July and August, just 3 months. But I decided to make good use of it and be happy for my friend.

So I went to congratulate him. After seeing him I realized that he was not happy as he was pretending. He also wants to be with us. But he was giving it up for something. I decided to find out why.

He left for Grimmauld Place then. For the next five months we were all busy with the NEWT preparations and it was not possible to be in contact with Harry as much as I liked. But we did send letters to each other once in a while. After the exams I wanted to stay in Grimmauld Place with harry and Ron, but Ron wanted both of us to stay in the Burrow. And my parents wanted to plan the wedding and wanted me to be in their house. So we decided that Ron would stay in the burrow. And I would stay in my parents' house. That way I can go for clothes shopping with my mother and also make her a bigger part of my life. I also decided to have dinner with Harry and Ron every alternate day, once with harry and once with Ron so that I can be in touch with both.

Finally on June 1st we completed our graduation. I gave the speech as the head girl and valedictorian. That day will always remain one of my fondest days. We also got a group photo of our class, one for each house and one with all the houses combined. But harry had not attended. He was not in Hogwarts, so he wouldn't be in these photos either. It felt wrong. After spending most of my school life with Ron on one side of me and Harry on other, it felt wrong to be a couple instead of a trio. That day I felt Harry was slowly drawing himself away from us. It was done gradually, but it was being done. I did not know why he was doing it. But I knew he was. And I decided to do whatever in my power to make him come back to me. I wanted him as my best friend again. I had spent one whole school year without harry, but I was not used to it. I would still miss him everyday.

I knew harry would be waiting for us in platform nine and three quarters he also wanted to see us. I also wanted to ask him what his NEWT scores were. He did not owl me for the past week. So I did not know his score. I know I should be angry at him for neglecting me and not even congratulating on my scores, but I am more interested in seeing him than being angry. So my last train ride in Hogwarts express was eventful. There were lots of tears and good bye's. Everyone teared up, even the ever comical Ron. But I knew we had each other and Harry. We will always be friends even after Hogwarts, after marriage, after fights, after everything. We three are always best friends. The only thing to it was solving the mystery of Harry.

Molly and Arthur had come to receive Me, Ron and Ginny. Harry had come with my parents. Looked like he had his arm in a sling. But I did not know when he had broken it. I also couldn't understand why he had not went to a healer instead of getting treated in the muggle way. I wanted to ask so much and more. At least now I knew that he did not deliberately neglect me. He had broken his right arm and couldn't write. So its OK. We had a enthusiastic get together in the train station. And harry left for Grimmauld Place. I learnt that he had hired a nurse for the past week to take care of him and that the sling would be removed today. It was broken when he sustained a accident in the hand to hand combat training. And even though the arm was treated magically it would take one week to get back to normal. I felt really jealous of the nurse taking care of my Harry. How dare she? It was my job, it was me who always took care of him, always.

But Harry did not seen to think it was a big deal. I guessed he is avoiding meeting me intentionally, but I couldn't prove it. He always behaved perfectly with me and Ron. But there was some sorrow which I could detect in his face and did not know why it was there. Ron never saw it. According to him Harry was fine. Somehow my instinct told me that something major was wrong with harry and he was refusing my help.

That day I reached home. Enjoyed with my parents. I went to meet Ron in the burrow for dinner. After dinner and a few kisses, I told him that I was planning on meeting him and Harry alternative days so that Harry will not feel left out. Ron also wanted to join me and Harry for dinner every alternative day. I first suspected that he was doing it so that i will not be with Harry alone. But then realized that Harry was Ron's best friend also. And both will be missing each other. So I told Ron that I will meet him at 8 PM in Grimmauld Place tomorrow and left.

The next day evening I left for Grimmauld Place an hour early. I wanted to confront Harry about his mysterious behaviour. This had gone on for long enough. I just wanted him back and I would get him back. So Going an hour early, I had a chance to talk to harry alone with out Ron's interference. I did not want to hide it from Ron, but harry communicates better when its only him and me, without Ron. I had a plan. I would go there, pretend that I am angry with him, start shouting and not stop until he starts telling me what was wrong. Harry would know I was pretending of course, but he would tell me what was wrong with him.

So I knocked on Grimmauld Place's door at 7 PM. Harry came and opened the door. As soon as I saw his sad face, all my plans went out of the window. I just hugged him and started crying. I did not know what made me think that I could pretend to be angry when Harry was sad. It is not possible. I just wanted to cry till all his sadness went away. But real life doesn't work like that. After 5 min of crying he asked "Whats wrong?". I realized that I was still in his arms. And I hugged him tighter and said "You". "I'm Sorry" he said. "You are wrong, Harry. You are not happy, you are pretending from the past 10 months. Why? Why wouldn't u talk to me? I am always here for you Harry" I said. He looked a bit happier.

Then I remembered that I never had the conversation with harry that I had planned to have with him when ron asked me to be to be his girl friend. It was 10 months overdue. But it had to be done. So I said "As much as I like hugging you, lets get inside and sit. We can talk a lot more comfortably then". He agreed with me and we both went inside. "Before you tell me whats wrong Harry, let me tell you some thing first." I said. He said "OK". So I started talking.

"Harry you know that you are the single most closest person to me right?" I asked. He started saying "Ron". But I stopped him, "Yes Harry, Ron might be my Fiance, we will marry and stay together, but even then I am not sure that he will take the place you have in my heart." I told. Harry looked very happy at this. And I now knew why he was sad. It was because he thought we would leave him behind. Typical Harry. So I thought I'd clarify it further and said "Nothing can break our friendship Harry. Not Ron, not even any future kids I have. You are and always will be my closest and best friend" I finished. But suddenly instead of the happy expression I was expecting, his face had no expression at all. It was like he was trying not to show any expression. Only his eyes were betraying any emotion and it was pain.

I thought it as a reaction to the still healing hand. Not to my words. I have not told anything that would cause him pain right? But I thought to ask anyway " Harry are you in pain? Its not something I said is it?" I asked. He was quick to deny "No Hermione, how can you think that? You are my best friend also and always will be" He said. But the tone was not right. It was almost like he was forcing himself to talk. And for one second his expression cleared before he masked it again. He had a lost expression on his face, almost like he did not know what to do. If only I can make him talk for 10 more minutes with me, he will tell me what is his problem, I thought happily. But then someone knocked the door. And Harry ran to get it like it was his lifeline.

I am not sure, but when he was walking away from me, I thought I saw him wipe his eyes discreetly. Almost like he did not want me to notice. But from when does harry cry? I could not make head or tail of his behaviour today. Harry came and brought Ron with him. And now his face had the well practiced fake smile on it. I can't help but think I have lost the chance to make him talk. And I could not help but be angry with Ron for the wrong timing of his arrival.

The next day it was decided that I would marry Ron on September 20th. The day after my birthday. Ron joked that it made remembering anniversaries easier. And I hit him before kissing him in front of the whole room. Happy times. For the next two months, there was not much change in my time table. Stay the whole day with my parents. Go for shopping. Plan wedding details. One night have dinner with Ron and another night with Ron and Harry. Harry suggested we not meet in Grimmauld Place. He wanted to go to a different restaurant everytime. I was thinking that it was because he did not want to meet me alone.

And I could not even go and meet him at Grimmauld Place in mornings as he had auror training. So just one month before my wedding, that is 10 days before September 1st Harry told us i.e. Me and Ron that he will not be able to attend out wedding. I was shocked. How could he not attend our wedding? We both started shouting at harry and threatened to cancel the marriage. But he told us that We both knew that he had to stay in the training area for 4 months from September 1st and he could not do anything about it. But he did not want to be so selfish as to make us postpone out marriage plans just because of 1 person. So he suggested Ron ask Neville to be the Best man and also asked to send him all the wedding photos by owl. I couldn't eat that day. Couldn't even stop crying. Finally Harry had enough of my crying and told me he would talk to the head of his training to grant him one day off to come to the wedding.

That calmed me down then. But now I realized he would not do that. That was just said to placate me. Harry knows me too well. So September 1st, we all, I mean, me, my parents and All the Weaselys went to Grimmauld Place to send off Harry. Everyone was in high spirits. Next time we see Harry, he will be Auror Harry Potter. I was happy for harry. But it took all my will power not to cry. He would not be there for my wedding. But the most surprising thing was my father and mother asking him to talk to them privately. And the three of them left to the kitchen.

I knew it was morally wrong to eavesdrop on them, but I could not contain my curiosity. So I went to the bathroom, took the twins extendable ear from my pocket and tapped on it with my wand. I was able to hear them now. My mother was asking "Have you packed everything, Harry?". "Yes Mrs Granger" Harry answered. "You are not coming to the wedding are you?" She asked. "No I couldn't" He said and started sobbing. From the sounds, it looked like my mother had hugged him. When did they become so close? They were almost treating him like a son. And my father said "Just hang in there Harry, it will get better. Don't do anything rash. Promise me". Harry's voice was very low. "I don't know what's the point in hanging in here Mr. Granger. But I'll promise you not to do anything rash". Harry answered.

I couldn't stop myself from crying. Now I knew my doubts were right. Harry had a problem. My parents know about it. However Harry or them both said nothing about it to me. But more important was that harry told he would not attend my wedding. So as soon as I know they came back to the main room, I ran to harry hugged him hard and said "Harry promise me you will attend my marriage." I knew if he promises he will be there. He had never broke a promise to me. But he would not tell me that. He said "I'll try Hermione." and pulled himself away from me gently and left.

That was 19 days ago. And today is my birthday. And it is the day I realized that Harry potter loves me. How did I realize that? I'll tell you after having a butter beer, my throat is parched.

A/N: How do you think it was? Good? Bad? Writing is not for me? Do tell me in the Comments. This is my first effort at writing anything. Please try to be constructive in critiquing it.


	2. The Realizations

Chapter 2: How did I come to the realization

So where were we? Yeah. I was about to tell you how I realized that Harry Potter is in love with me. I have told you what happened till September 1st right? Harry left that morning. And my marriage was just 20 days away. So I also became busy. You wouldn't believe how stressful the days have been. When I overheard the conversation between Harry and my parents, I wanted nothing but to confront my parents then and there. But there were many things to complete. I wanted to complete everything before today, i.e. September 19th, so that I will have full time free today. I wanted to enjoy my last birthday as a single woman to the fullest. And I fulfilled it. Today there is nothing to do for the wedding.

When I woke up today, I woke up to a lot of presents. I had assumed I will not get so many as many people will want to give me a combined present for both my Birthday and my marriage. But looked like I got many presents. There are three presents of note I want to mention here. The first is from my parents combined, they gave me a key to a home just round the corner from here. I am not sure I will use it, as I may live in the burrow for some time, but it is one of the best presents I got. The Second is from Ron, he has given me a beautiful necklace. I don't want to think how much money it cost. It is a lovely gift. I am wearing it tomorrow for our wedding. I did not think anyone could present me something better than it. Until I saw Harry's present. He had given me a certificate giving the ownership of the bookstore **Flourish and Blotts. **Me and Harry may not be in the best of terms right now, but he still understood that I no longer wanted to be an auror. I am not even sure Ron understood that. But Harry had. That made me realize how much I would miss him in my wedding. So I decided that it was time to confront my parents about Harry's problem.

When I went downstairs from my room, both of my parents were having breakfast. I decided to behave as though I had not overheard them. I did not want to explain how I happened to overhear their conversation. So I went down and said "Good Morning, Mum, Dad". They both hugged me and wished me a Happy Birthday. They had no practice for the past week and next because of my marriage. So they were very relaxed now. I decided that it is not the time for subtlety and told them "Mum, Dad, I want to talk to you both about Harry". "What about him dear?" my mother asked. "He always looked sad, for more than a year now. Do you both know what's wrong with him?" I asked. "Honey, He is your best friend. If you don't know, what are the chances of us knowing?" My mother countered. So I knew that direct approach would not work. My mom can be more stubborn than me and can keep a secret. So I decided to try it in another way.

"Yes mum, you are right. May be I don't know why he is sad. But I want him to be there for the wedding. I plan to send him an owl to ask him to come" I said. "No Hermione. He told you he would come if his head permitted didn't he. May be he will turn up tomorrow" my mother answered. But I knew he wouldn't come. He said the same thing to my parents. I didn't know why they were defending him instead of supporting me. "I didn't ask for your permission mum, I was just telling you what I was planning to do" I told them to make them angry enough to tell me what was wrong. It was a strategy I had used in the past to get secrets out of them. I was expecting my mother to have a counter argument, but it was my father who answered "Hermione, you may be another man's wife by tomorrow. And tomorrow our words may not mean much to you. But today you are still our daughter and will respect our wishes, and not torture the poor boy" and my father and mother were as angry as the time when I removed the memory charms.

And I felt guilty for making it seem as though their feelings were not important to me. So I apologized to both of them. And told them that I always respect their wishes whether I had a husband or not. And left them in the dining room and came back to my room. Talking to my parents was a disaster, but I had got more information. May be by this I will be able to solve the puzzle of what was bothering Harry. What's the new information you ask? Well my father commented that coming to my marriage was _torture_ to Harry. So I had to solve why? I started thinking up scenarios. .

1. May be he doesn't want to meet Ginny - Wrong - _He was the one who would not get together even when she wanted to. _

2. May be he really is busy and cannot spare time to come to my wedding - Wrong - _If he can get a special dispensation from the ministry of magic to start auror training one year early, he can get a day off._

3. May be he still has not forgiven Me and Ron for our behaviour in our sixth year - Possible - _But he looked sad not angry, so may not be a major reason._

4. May be he is in love with some one else and she rejected him - Possible - _But this does not explain why he is not ready to attend MY wedding._

So this was the end of my creativity, even with the new information, I could not get why Harry was not ready to attend my wedding. I went through the whole past year remembering if I had done something wrong in regards to Harry. But all I could make out was Harry intentionally gradually cut contact from me. But why? I thought that I could sit here in my room and think all day but I will not be able to come up with an answer. But my mother and father knew the answer to this puzzle. So it is logical to talk to them about it.

For that I needed my father alone. I knew my mother would not give up a secret. She is My mother. So she is better at it than I am. But my father is a different matter. If I can talk to him alone he will tell me what the problem is. He loves me too much to keep a secret from me. And I knew how to make him talk also. All it takes is honesty and telling him my happiness depends on whether he tells me the secret or not. And it is not a lie, I will not be happy if Harry is sad. I will not have any problem convincing him. The opportunity presented itself when my mother left for a supermarket to buy some things. And my father was in the study. I did not know why I was so nervous to go and talk to him, but I was. And I also realized that if I did not talk now the chance would be lost. So I went in determined.

"Dad, can I talk to you?" I asked. He closed the book he was reading from and replied "Sure honey, what's the matter?". "I want to apologise for what I said during breakfast, I really did not mean that." I said. "I know and Its OK" he answered. "Can you please tell me what's wrong with Harry daddy?" I asked. He was taken aback by my request. He did not expect me to ask that. "We already told you we don't know, didn't we?" he answered. I was not giving up so easily this time. "But I know you do, please dad, it's really important for me to know it" I answered. "How do you know that? And why is knowing what's wrong with Harry so important to you?" He asked. I knew if I answered this question correctly my father will tell me what he knew. So I carefully started answering:

"As to how I know, I overheard you three, which is you, mum and Harry talking on September 1st before Harry left. And why is it important, it is because it is Harry dad. You know that we are best friends. Before sixth year I was closer to Harry than to Ron. And sixth year I decided to date Ron, so I behaved erratically and distanced myself from Harry. But he has always been a great friend. More than Ron even. Just today when I was thinking back about the previous year, I realized that he has been intentionally moving away from me. He did it gradually. But the fact is he did it. I know it's not my mistake. I know there is a problem he is facing. That's why he looked sad the whole year. Before previous year, he would always come to me to solve his problems, or at least discuss them. But not previous year. Either he has changed or he thinks I have made a mistake. I want to know what it is so that I could correct this misunderstanding and have him back in my life." I completed passionately. I myself did not know I felt so deeply about the whole issue. I did not even realize when I had started crying. But I was crying uncontrollably.

It took me about 5 minutes to cool down and become calm enough to talk, by which time my dad had finished mixing a whiskey for him and wine for me. He just put the glass in front of me and I took a sip and started to listen. "Hermione, I truly believe you want to know what the problem is to correct it. But answer some of my questions first before I tell you why he behaved like he did" my father offered. "OK dad" I answered. "First question is: Could Ron really accept that you and Harry can be very close even after you marry?" my father asked. "May be or may not be. But Harry is my friend and I will not cut ties with him just because my husband is insecure" I answered. "Do you really feel that your marriage will be a happy one if you are closer to your best friend than your husband?" my father asked. "I don't know Dad, all I know is I don't want to lose Harry" I answered.

"If you don't know then think long and hard about them. They may be the clue to your happiness in life" my father said cryptically. I did not understand what he meant. I was staring blankly at him. "Do you really want to know what the problem is Hermione? This may complicate your life more then you imagine." he asked. I realized this was his way of asking me to give up. But I was not in a mood to do that. "Yes dad. I want to know." I answered. "OK fine" he said. "Do you know any girl Harry had dated this past year?" he asked. "No dad. But why would that be important? It is not like he doesn't get girls to go out with. Any girl in the wizarding world will go out with him. He just has to ask" I told him. "That's why it is so important. Has he asked anyone out this past year?" my father persisted. "No. He has even rejected his ex who wanted to get back." I answered. "Good that you know that" My dad said.

"When did Harry start looking sad Hermione?" my dad asked. This was his way of making me realize the truth without telling it himself. My dad is always like that, from my childhood. All his explanations were interactive. So it did not feel out of place for me to keep on answering his questions and find a central theme to them. "On the day we meet with Minerva McGonagall" I answered. I was absolutely sure that this was the day I first saw him sad. "Can you guess why?" my father asked. "I assumed then because, he was visiting Hogwarts where he saw Dumbledore die. I guess I am wrong" I answered. My father nodded. "You are wrong. What else happened that day?" He asked. "Nothing" I answered. "Come on Hermione. You are not that dumb. What did you announce that day during breakfast?" He asked. "We, that is Ron and I, announced we are a couple. But Ron asked me out the previous day, if that's what you are asking" I answered. "Ron may have asked you the previous day, but when did Harry get to know it?" My father asked. "That day only" I answered unconcerned. And looked back to him in shock as I realized what he wanted me to realize. "Dad, are you telling me that Harry fancies me?" I pleaded, hoping he will say no. If he says yes, things will get a lot more complicated. I thought my dad knew that, that's why he asked me to give up. "No Hermione, Harry does not fancy you." He answered. Before I could sigh in relief my dad started talking again "Harry loves you, Hermione. He would do anything for you." He completed.

I was shocked. This was not even remotely one of the scenarios I imagined when I thought of Harry's problems. I wanted to solve Harry's problem and I was the problem. Some things about his behaviour started making sense now. But I still was not ready to accept this. "If he loved me as you say dad, why did he not tell me?" I asked. "He planned to ask you out on a date on your birthday. But Ron bet him to it" my dad answered. "He could still have told me" I persisted. "Harry did not want to come between the happiness of two of his best friends" my father answered. That is what Harry would do. He would give up, if he felt that we were happy together. I knew that about Harry. But now I wanted to think, alone. I wanted to know how it affected my life. Tomorrow is my wedding and now I learn my best friend is in love with me. I needed time and advice. But now just now. But before I left for my room to think I wanted to ask one final question to my dad. "Is Harry angry with me or Ron?" I asked. "No he is sad, obviously. But he is not about to get angry on his best friends who made a choice which made them happy" my father answered. But I felt he was repeating Harry's words. May be Harry himself had told this to my father.

I still had some doubts, like how Harry and my parents became so close. How did he tell the girl's parents that he loves the girl when she is engaged to someone else. But I thought dealing with my feelings were more important than getting information on trivial things. So I thanked my dad. Told him I need some time to think. I also knew that I wanted to talk to my mother. My dad was not so good about emotions. So I asked him to send my mother to my room once she comes. And left for my room to think and to cry.

So now I know one crucial bit of information. That Harry loves me. And that was the clue to solve the puzzle. All the things that I thought was mysterious in Harry Potter's behaviour became perfectly normal when I saw things through his perspective

1. Harry always looked sad from the day we met Minerva McGonagall, that was also the day me and Ron became a couple - _Obviously he would be sad. The person he loved was dating another boy_

2. He offered the chance for Ron to be the Head boy by giving it up - _He wanted us to be happy, also he did not want to stay in the same common room as me and watch me and Ron kiss. It would have killed him._

3. He jumped at the chance to clean our house and get it operational for my parents - _He wanted some time to be alone to get adjusted to the new developments and think about his reactions to it._

4. He did not enrol in Hogwarts - _This was his self preservation acting as I told in the beginning of this story, he knew when to cut losses. To come to Hogwarts and watch me and Ron together would be too much for him._

5. He did not get together with Ginny - _Of Course, he will not get together with Ginny when he is in love with me, will he?_

6. He started to gradually send less letters to me - _He knew Ron and I were serious about this relationship and would not have so much time for him later (Not true, but this is what he would have thought) so he started preparing for it._

7. He started auror training one year early - _See the reasoning for point 4_

8. He almost looked like he was crying when I called him my best friend when I went to Grimmauld Place, I was the reason for the pain I saw in his eyes - _It hurt him when I called him my best friend, because he wanted me to be so much more_

9. He could not attend my wedding. - _I don't blame him for this now, had I been in his position, I'd have probably run away to some place remote, long ago_

Now I have Harry Potter figured out, but I am not able to figure out my feelings. I am feeling so sad that Harry had to go through all that alone. And I am surprising myself by being happy that Harry Potter loves me. And tomorrow is my wedding. Could life get any weirder? I want to think about my feelings, I want to decide what to do about this new development, but for this I need my mother who is not yet back from the supermarket.

But what about me? How do I feel about Harry? Or the more apt question is do I love Harry more or Ron more? What do I feel for Ron? So many questions. I will start with Ron. I love Ron, that's the reason I agreed to marry him. And I think during more than the one previous year we have been a couple, we have proved that we can last as a couple. With Ron as my Husband and Harry as my Best Friend I will be perfectly happy. I have no doubt about it. But the doubt comes in when I picture Ron as my Husband and Harry as a distant friend or even an acquaintance. I could not even think about such a possibility without a pain in my heart. So even if I marry Ron, I want Harry as my best friend.

Can I think about Harry as my husband? Of course I can. This is not the first time I am thinking it either. When both of your best friends are guys, it is logical that you get together with one of them. And for a long time I thought it was Harry, only when Harry went out with Cho, I thought Harry Potter can never choose me and went after Ron. And I sincerely thought that I had moved on, that whomever Harry decides to date, I will not be jealous. That's true too. But what I was not prepared for was Harry potter to be absent from my life completely. I couldn't stomach that idea. But now I know that I have not moved on. The happiness I felt when I realized that Harry loves me was not fake. So I love Harry too.

So all it is left for me to decide now is to know whom I love more - Harry or Ron. I already know I want Harry as my best friend even if I marry Ron. But in an imaginary world if I marry Harry and Ron will not be my best friend, can I bear it? I can. I already proved that in the tent when I did not go with Ron and stayed with Harry. I have always subconsciously chosen Harry over Ron. But now the things are different. Our marriage is a spectacle. The entire wizarding world knows it. When two of the three heroes of the war marry it will be a big deal. And the one more thing that I have to consider is can I break Ron's heart now, just a day before the wedding, when I don't even know if me and Harry can last long. What will Ron think of me? What will all my friends think of me?

I don't know what I want to do. I will have to talk with my mother to find out and straighten out my thinking if there are some mistakes in it. But I have realized two most important things in the past one hour

One: Harry Loves Me

Two: I love Harry

I hear the door bell ringing. That I think is my mother coming back from the supermarket. I don't even know what I want to talk to her or what direction must my life take from here. But I know that whatever the decision I take today, will make or break my life.

A/N: I hope this chapter is up to all the expectations. Read and review. But while reviewing please keep in mind that this is my first fanfiction. I specifically wanted to thank all the people who reviewed previous chapter, added it to their favourite stories. It was very motivating to think that so many of you liked my work. And a big thank you for all my readers.


	3. Plan of Action

Chapter 3: Plan of Action

I was correct in assuming that it was my mother who rang the bell. I wanted to run and open the door, hug her and start crying. But I did not do that. If my dad opens the door and explains what we spoke about then I could get to the plan of what I wanted to do much quicker. So I sat down in my room on my bed and waited. And waited. I could hear them speaking although not the words. They were talking for at least 30 minutes before I could hear my mother on the stairs. She was coming to see me. I decided that with my mom's help I would think this out rationally and select one of the two options I had, they were

a. Marry Ron tomorrow and be prepared to lose Harry or

b. Break off with Ron, possibly fight with him, make the whole world think that I am insane (_I__told__that__our__marriage__was__dubbed__the__marriage__of__the__century__by__the__press__, __didn__'__t__I__?_) and try to see if Harry is interested in going out with me now.

I know any one with even some sense of logic will actually ask me to chose the first option. 'Don't take unnecessary risks' they will say. 'A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush' they will say. But that's what happens when Harry comes into the equation. All my sense of logic leaves me. I will do something _anything_illogical if it keeps Harry happy. But in this case Harry's happiness is tied to Ron's unhappiness and keeping Ron happy means making Harry sad. So I am not able to decide what to do. That's the reason I wanted my mother to come and advise me. And she came.

As soon as she comes she starts talking "I shouldn't have left you alone with your father. Of all the days for you to know the truth, he chose to tell it to you on the day before your marriage" she said. Even though her voice did not indicate it, I can see that she is very concerned about me knowing this information. I cannot even now understand why they kept this information from me in the first place. So I start with that "Better now than after marriage mum. Why didn't you tell me that Harry loves me before this?" I asked. "It was Harry who had to decide whether to tell you or not. And he decided not to tell you. We thought it was better if we did not interfere in you love life" my mother explained. I thought that she had a point. I would not have taken it well if they had told me without me asking about it. We were both silent for some time. I did not know how to approach the subject. And my mom was gauging my mood I think. Finally she had enough of the silence.

"So why the long face? You know what's wrong with Harry now. And you even know that he will come around. It may take some time, but you both are his best friends and he will learn to be happy for you two." she said. I considered her words. I knew why Harry was sad and pulling away. But I did not think that he will ever come back and be best friends with us again. That is his character. He will never harm us, but he will also keep a bit of a distance so that we cannot hurt him. "That's the problem mum. I don't want him to be happy for us. I want him to be happy _with_us" I said.

When she did not answer me for sometime I decided pretending that there is no need to make a decision will not help. My mother only knows that Harry loves me, but she doesn't know that I also love Harry. So I can get her to talk about my options only if I give her the full information. "There is also something else mom" I said. "What is it?" She asked. "I love Harry, too" I said. And it felt so good admitting it out loud. It almost brought a grin on my face. Now my mom was stunned. She was also thinking the possibilities now. "What do I do mum?" I asked. "The choice is yours. Decide with whom you will be happier and continue" She said. I thought she had taken the information surprisingly well. I was about to reply when she started talking "I am not happy about the time of your realization of your own feelings. But I will keep the lecture for later. Lets solve this before it becomes a crisis" she said.

"Mum is there anyway that we three can be best friends again?" I asked her. "Not after this. No" She answered. "After either your marriage or breaking off of that marriage, one boy becomes closer than the other. You just have to decide whom you want to be closer to". I could understand the logic behind her statement. But she was not done yet. "Basically trio's are not perfect. There is always a person who will get hurt. However you interact, whatever you do, trio is always a hero, a heroine and a sidekick. So decide who is your hero. The only thing you can do is making sure 2 people are not unhappy. It is a given that Harry or Ron ends up hurt. So as I said in the beginning, it comes down to choosing who you would be happier with" She said. I really admire my mother for her knack of getting down to all the basics and remove complexities and come up with a simple solution. But this time, she wanted me to choose. I was not about to let go of it so easily either.

"So who would you select for me?" I asked. "Don't you think that the question is a bit too late? you are already engaged. So my and your fathers choices do not matter now. We only want you to be happy and only you can select you happiness." She said. I was not the person to give up so easily. I wanted to know whom they thought was better for me, Harry or Ron. So I asked "Mom please, tell me what to do". My mother thought about it. "My opinion will be biased baby. Not only that it will also bias your decision, which I think is not correct. This is something you have to do on your own." she answered. "I am not asking you to chose for me mum. I just want to know whom you think is better for me, even if it is biased." I asked again. "OK then. I think Harry will be a better husband to you than Ron." She said. I was about to interrupt her telling her that I thought Ron would also make a good husband, but she continued "Not that I doubt Ron, but for him we are just Muggles. And after you marry Ron there will be some part of you that he will not understand. And Harry can. He is also very close to us that is me and your dad." She told.

I was very happy that she thought so highly of Harry. And it was looking like that I would not go through my marriage. But somehow I was happy with this development. I am not able to understand what I would do with respect to Ron. But there is a serious weakness in me as soon as Harry is concerned. I will give up everything for him.

"So you think breaking off engagement with Ron is a good idea mum?" I asked. I wanted her to tell yes. If she says that, I can simply stop thinking and accept her decision as that is what I wanted to do. But she is my mother. She wanted to make sure that I understand the full consequences of my actions, so she said "Breaking off an engagement is never a good decision baby. You have to think about what it does to your image in your world. Today you are a war hero, but as soon as this hits the papers tomorrow, they will start thinking of you as a person who cannot decide things. Your reputation will take a hit, not only with the public but also with your friends. And the Weasley's may never be close to you or Harry again, if you go in that path" she completed. It was a lot to take in and a lot to consider. I should have thought of these things before, why didn't I?

Anyway I was not a stranger to being bad mouthed by the press, I can handle it. I can also handle people thinking of me as a woman without morals, I had already done that when I was in my 4th year. But I am not sure whether I can handle all the Weasley's not interacting with me or Harry. This has changed from the selection between Ron and Harry to a selection between Harry and all the Weasley's. Why can't the decisions get simpler? Why should they always get complicated? I asked my mom to leave me alone for a while as I wanted to think as it was 12 noon now, I had exactly 24 hours for my marriage, a marriage which never takes place.

I thought about what I wanted. I wanted Harry. I always wanted him in my life. Even when I am engaged to Ron, I always wanted Harry as my best friend. Now that I know he wants me as much more than that, I could not think beyond that point. I wanted Harry and that's it. I did not want anyone more than him. I did not want Ron or the Weasley's or the whole world. That's not to say I do not want them as my friends, I do. But if I have to chose only one, I realized now that it will always be Harry. I love him too much to not have him as a part of my life. I love him so much that I am ready to leave everything and everyone else behind. My decision was made. It is and always has been Harry.

The thing that I had to do now was go to my mother and discuss how to break this news to Ron and his family. My mother and father always n some good ideas about how to do it. But all I wanted to do was apparate to the auror training centre and tell Harry "I love you". But even if I love Harry and even if he comes above everyone else to me, I wanted to be honest. I wanted to properly break off with Ron before I propose or let other person kiss me. May be I am old fashioned but this is me. So I have to go downstairs and tell my mother about my decision.

I went down and saw both my mother and father were sitting not talking to each other. They were worried about my decision. But they did not come to my room and pressurise me or force my opinions on me. I happen to have the best parents in the whole world. I went down and without any preamble started talking "Mom, Dad, I am in love with Harry. I felt I settled for Ron because I decided that Harry was unavailable. Ron is a great guy, but he can never come close to my Harry. So I have decided to break off the engagement and go meet Harry today". Both my parents were stunned and very happy. They knew it was the right decision. I just realized you can fool yourself but you can never fool your parents.

However the happy mood was ruined by the ringing of the door bell. My father went to get it. Before he even moved two steps, the door bell rang again. And again. I had decided that it had to be a wizard, who did not know how to use the door bell on the other side of the door. My guess was correct and eye opening. My father opened the door (The bell had rung 10 times before that). And on the other side of the door was Ron. I knew I had to greet him, I knew I had to say something, but all the thought in my mind was my mothers voice saying _And__after__you__marry__Ron__there__will__be__some__part__of__you__that__he__will__not__understand_. Wow mum you are right. He cannot even ring a door bell properly. How did I think of making him mix with muggles? I thought. I did not how many such small and important things I had missed because I had become obsessed with being his girl friend in my sixth year.

I heard my father greeting him "Hello Ron, come inside". "Hello Mr. Granger, can I speak to Hermione privately?" Ron asked. Before my father could reply I said "You can Ron" and smiled at him. He was looking very angry, almost like he knew that I had planned to break off the engagement today. Both my parents left us in the living room and left for the study. I knew they could hear us perfectly fine and wanted to put a silencing charm, but decided against it. After me and Ron fight and he leaves, I wanted my parents for moral support. And having them listening means that I need not repeat what he said to them, so I let it be and asked him "What is it Ron? Why are you so angry?". He did not answer. He took some time to cool down and said "You are right, I am angry but not with you. I am angry with the twins. They were telling that Harry loves you and once you realize that you love Harry too, you will leave me. Tell me they are wrong baby" he said.

I was thinking, although it is the worst way for him to know the truth, I was relived that I need not start this awkward conversation. I sometimes doubt whether I fully belong in Gryffindor. Now that the whole story was out in the open I only had to say yes and Ron would take care of rest. He had given me an easy way out and I planned on taking it. "Ron I know this is not the best way for you to find out, and this is not the best time either, but the twins are right. I am in love with Harry, but I just realized it today. Not before. If I knew before, I would never have accepted your proposal. It may look like I led you on. I did not. I honestly thought that I loved you ay that time. But please believe me I did love you but I love Harry more" I completed.

Ron was really angry now. His whole face had turned Red. And he was clearly trying not to talk. He calmed down it almost took him two minutes to calm down, but once he calmed down he was almost resigned to the fact. "Already past tense Hermione? You loved me? you don't love me anymore?" He asked, no, pleaded. I did not answer. What do you answer to such a question?. Anyway he decided on something. And started talking "I believe you Hermione. But you may now go and propose to Harry? what will you do if he doesn't want to be with you anymore?" he asked. "I haven't thought about that possibility" I answered honestly. "In such a case I am always here for you" He said.

I could not understand his behaviour. He is normally the talk first, regret later type of guy. Looked like his personality had taken a 180 degree turn when I was not looking. "Why are you doing this Ron?" I asked. "Was not it a muggle who said 'If you love something set it free, if it comes back its yours forever, if not it was never meant to be' I am just following it" he said. "Thanks Ron" I said and returned the engagement ring. He took it and put it in his pocket and told "If you decide to stay with Harry you will take all the blame in the papers. I will play the victim and gain more popularity. Deal?" He asked. I could not understand him. It looked like the gain of popularity was more important to him than the loss of his wife. "Deal" I said. And he left.

"Mom, Dad you heard everything. Can you tell me what hapenned? I can't make heads or tails of this last conversation" I asked my parents as they came back from the study. They were also thrown off by his behaviour. We all saw him angry as he came in. But He did not behave like he normally would. Normally he would shout create a scene etc... But this time he did not do anything. He just accepted the fact and left. And my parents were at a loss what to do. They also did not expect him to behave like that. My life is seeming like one mystery after another. I just had solved Harry's mystery and suddenly Ron had started to behave oddly. I just hope that Ron's mystery will not take as long to solve as Harry's took.

Just when we were deciding what to do, we heard the door bell ring again. And I thought I heard twins voices outside. I was right. It was the twins. And they were more serious than any other time I have seen them. "Where is Ron's dead body?" Fred asked. "We have come to collect it." George added. I really tried hard not to laugh. I mean I am confused beyond measure and my life is going in a direction which I had not expected it to take. I want to meet Harry and I am very tensed about how he would receive me. But as soon as the twins started talking, I could not stop laughing. They were the best in making people laugh. They knew something was wrong between me and Ron. They were serious about the whole situation, but they know how to make people laugh and diffuse a tense situation.

Once we started laughing, I asked the twins "When did Ron become so mature?". "He was mature?" Fred asked. "You mean he did not say or do anything stupid?" George asked. Before I could answer "You did not hex him?" Fred asked. "Ok guys stop. He did not do anything stupid. In fact he was the perfect gentleman. As soon as I said I loved Harry, he practically asked me to go back to Harry but he asked me only to take the blame in the papers tomorrow" I finished. "We should have known, he is a very good chess player right?" Fred started. "Yeah, he just used the strategy in real life thats all" George said. "Those were not his real reactions. He hid them because there was a high chance of winning you back if he behaved like he did." Fred finished.

I did not understand what they were telling. So I asked them to explain. I wanted to know the whole story from their viewpoint. But I asked only one to talk. Because if they both started talking at the same time, I would go mad with headache. They were just staring at each other, trying to decide whether to talk to me or not. Finally they decided to talk and started. "You know we are not supposed to talk bad things about our brother. But seeing as you have already called of your engagement we will tell you." Fred stated. "Ron did not really love you in the beginning. He just wanted you because he wanted something that Harry did not have. That's it. I am not telling you that he did not start to love you later. But his primary intentions were to distance you and Harry. And looks like he succeeded. And regarding today, there are some of us who believe that you and Harry are perfect for each other. We were talking away from Ron about going and forcing Harry to attend your wedding tomorrow. So that he would break down and tell you that he loves you. And if we knew you would at least postpone the wedding for sometime to think things through. We wanted to do that for Harry. He is also one of our brothers. And we wanted him to have a chance at happiness. But Ron overheard our plan and came to head you off. But you had already realized that. And his behaviour now just has a high chance of winning you back that's all. You need not worry about him. As long as he has the fame he wants he will be happy." Fred concluded his long lesson.

I was stunned. I knew that Ron loved me. But I did not know that he wanted me only because he saw me as something Harry cannot have. I am not a thing to belong to someone and not belong to some one else. It also meant that he knew what was wrong with Harry all along and behaved like he did not know so that I would not realize it. I wanted to find him and hex him. "I will go and find that idiot and I am going to - " I started but I was interrupted by George. "Hermione you go to the Hero. We will take care of the git." He said.

My plan was now complete. I would go to the auror training center and talk to Harry. I normally plan such things in meticulous detail, but today was not a normal day. I just wanted to meet Harry and tell him that I love him too. So that was my only plan.

A/N: This is the third chapter people. Please tell me how it was, in the reviews.


	4. Happily ever After

Chapter 4: Happily ever after?

So now my plan was set. I would go to Auror training centre, meet Harry, talk to him and live happily ever after, right? But it is not so easy. Had I had few more days, I would have taken time to know when he will be free, I would have prepared what I would talk to him once I meet him, and I would have also anticipated his responses and prepared to either accept them or have a counter argument for it. But the problem this time is that, I do not have time to prepare. I want to tell him that I love him, I do not want him to read that in the 'Daily Prophet' that _someone told someone else that someone heard it being said that Hermione loves Harry_. So I have to go there without preparation and convince him that it is not pre-martial jitters that made me leave Ron.

And adding to all this trouble is that I do not know how Harry will react. Will he be ready to accept me with open arms even if I have given him heart ache for the past one year? Will he even listen to me and believe me? Will he just out right reject me because I did not give him a chance before? Or how will I convince him to the fact that I will not leave him and go to Ron the same way I left Ron and came for him? What are the chances that things have not changed in the past 3 weeks he is been in the training? What if he has got a girl friend now?

I am sure you understand now. I have too many questions and no answers. But I trust Harry, from the day he was my best friend, he would never intentionally behave in a way that hurts me. And he will give me a chance to explain, I am very sure of that. But what will I do if Harry has decided to move on? This is a possibility that I had to plan for, everything else I can trust Harry, but as Harry does not know I love him, there is a possibility he had moved on and I have to accept it and plan for it. But one thing is sure. I will not get back with Ron. Never. Once I realized that Harry loves me and I love Harry, being with Ron has lost its appeal. May be if Harry has moved on, I will wait for him as he waited for me these days. That will be the only option available to me. But its alright. First and foremost I have to meet Harry now.

The one great thing about being a war hero is you can get into some places you could not before. I can get permission to visit Auror training center simply by talking to the minister of magic whom I also happen to know personally because he belonged to Order of the Phoenix. So one floo call to the Minister of Magic's office later I am ready to leave for the Auror training center. I am just awaiting the portkey which will leave in 5 min time. And I still have no idea how Harry will receive me or what I will tell him. But one good thing is Harry will know I am going to meet him and there is a private area where we can meet. This portkey will take me there and he will be there as his superiors will have informed him to meet me there. So Harry here I come.

I reached the auror academy, the portkey directly delivered me directly to the waiting area. But Harry is not here. Looks like I have to wait. But I can take this time to decide what I will talk, or at least what my first sentence will be. It will not be I Love you Harry. If I do that he will not believe me. He will think that I have got to know that he loves me and have taken pity on him. That's the reason I will not tell him that I love him. I will make him tell me. But that is easier said than done. Getting a secret out of Harry is very difficult. Although I have to admit that I have more success at getting secrets out of Harry than anyone else. So I hope this time also he will open up and talk to me. Once we start talking I am sure we can resolve this whole situation. Lets see.

Harry comes in without looking up he says "I was told I have a visitor. I am not giving any interviews". I guess that's because other than the auror trainees and aurors the only people allowed to visit the training center are the press. So its natural that Harry assumed that it was someone trying to get an interview. But I interrupt him, "I do not want your interview Harry, although a few minutes of your time will be very nice.". Now he looks up and starts apologizing "Hermione, I am so sorry, I already meet at least one journalist a day asking for interviews so I just assumed that it would be them. My superior did not tell me that you would be visiting, he just told me that I had a visitor that's it. I am really really sorry". I am amused that he is feeling bad for such a small misunderstanding so I say "Its ok Harry. I don't mind". He looks relieved to see that I am not mad at him and relaxes. "So lets sit" he says and sits on the bench. I sit next to him. Even though I am not showing it in my face, I am very nervous, I do not know what to talk or how to approach this subject.

"So what brings you here?" Harry asks me and looks at me. Before I answer he asks "Are you alright? you look very tensed. Did I miss something?" He asks again. I told you that I was not showing nervousness in my face, but it is difficult to hide anything from Harry and it is difficult for him to hide anything from me. "No, Nothing wrong. I just came here to look at my friend". I answer. "Oh, why today?" he asks. "Do you have some work? Should I not be visiting you today?" I ask. "No its not that, you have your marriage tomorrow and you are here today, that's why I asked, is all." He answers.

We both go silent. He will not press for me to talk. That is one of the best things about Harry, he will just let me be and talk when and how I want. I take this silence to observe him. Although he is trying to be upbeat about my visiting him, He looks every bit as sad as the day he left us to come to the auror training centre. So that means he doesn't have any girlfriend. He will accept me, I tell to myself.

I decide that I should now start pushing him till he accepts that he loves me and then tell him the story about how I got to know and what happened later. So I break the silence "So whats wrong Harry?" I ask. "Whats wrong? Nothing, why do you ask?" he questions me back. "Why did you decide not to come to my wedding?" I ask hoping he would accept. But this is Harry Potter when has he ever made things easier? "You know the answer Hermione. I cannot. I will not be allowed to skip a day of training otherwise I would have been there, you know that." he answers. "Really Harry? You know that reason doesn't hold right? If you can talk the minister and start the course one year early, you can talk to him and take one day off, I am sure. Or If you do not want to talk to him I will do that for you" I complete my argument. I know that he has no way out. He can either accept the real reason or he can accept to come to my wedding _which is not happening._ He was silent, He did not answer anything.

"There is some other reason isn't there? There is some thing which you are not telling me Harry, what is it?" I ask forcefully. He tries to divert the subject "Hermione, Did you by any chance attend the interrogation course in auror training. You are doing a very good job" he says. But by this time I am getting angry. This guy is not going to accept anything straightly, all I know is some people thinking that he loves me and he is not accepting it. I have been here for more than a hour and I could not get one meaningful word out of him. "Stop changing the subject Harry. What is the real reason? What is wrong?" I ask again. "Hermione, I am perfectly alright. There is nothing wrong. I just cannot come, why can't you understand that?" He asks and that signals the end of my patience.

I start shouting at him "Nothing Wrong? Nothing Worng? Are you sure? You have intentionally distanced yourself from me for the past one year, not coming to Hogwarts, starting auror training early even when we had decided to do it together, and not even talking more than two sentences every time we meet, now finally refusing to come to my wedding and you tell me there is nothing wrong. What part of it was right?" I ask him. "Hermione, its not like you think-" He starts but I override him. "From how many years do you know me Harry?" I ask. "You know that already" He answers. "Thats not an answer. From how many years do you know me?" I ask again. "Eight", he answers.

"A person who knows me for the past eight years, my best friend, who knows about me as much as I know myself, forgot to wish me on my birthday when I came to talk to him today. And he says nothing is wrong. Should I believe him Harry?" I ask. Now he is looking genuinely surprised that he has forgotten to wish me on my birthday. He had sent a present but a simple 'Happy Birthday' from him as soon as he saw me means much to me and he knows that. "Oh, Hermione, I am really sorry. Its not that I forgot your birthday. I can't. I even sent you a present, I hope you have received it. Its just that I had some other thing on my mind and … and … er... anyway Happy Birthday Hermione" he said. I knew he had not forgotten my birthday but still now I got an opening to make him talk. "Its Ok Harry. I got your present and loved it. I now own a bookstore thanks to you. But stop telling me there is nothing wrong. Just tell me whats was that something on your mind and we both will be happy" I tell him. I can't understand how this guy is not picking up all the hints.

"I am sorry Hermione, I cannot tell you" he says. "Why not Harry? You know you can talk to me about anything" I try to encourage him. "Everything else, but this is something which I have to handle on my own. And I will, you know you were right. I did all the things you said to distance myself, but give me time, you are still my best friend. Just don't ask me anymore details. I do not want to talk about these things, not with you" He completed. "Why Harry?" I ask. "Don't push Hermione. If I talk now, I cannot even imagine the consequences. So Lets have this talk later, much much later" He says. "OK Harry. I am going to make a deal with you. If you tell me why you decided not to come to my wedding, I will tell you why I broke up with Ron and cancelled the wedding" I tell.

He was completely shocked. Now I know our talk was at an end, the only thing holding him back from telling me that he loves me was my wedding. As it is no longer in the equation now, I was sure he will accept that. You may be thinking why am I obsessed with making him accept that he loves me. I will tell you, Its not the same when someone else tell you that he loves you. He has to tell me, I love him but unless he tells me I cannot accept it. Because in such life changing decisions I cannot go on assumptions. So stop thinking I am a sadist for putting him through with this question and answer session.

"You broke up with Ron? Why what went wrong? Are you alright with it? How can you be so calm about it?" He started firing questions at me without stopping. "Not telling anything until you tell me the reason you had decided not to come to my wedding" I said. "Hermione this is much more important than any of my problems. How are you so calm? What really happened?" He asked. "Harry I already know why you were not coming to my wedding, why can't you come out and accept it? are you a Gryffindor or not?" I question. And he says "You know what?" I keep silent.

"OK Hermione, I give up. I Love you thats the reason I started distancing myself from you and Ron, it hurt to see you together, but you both were my best friends. So I decided that I should leave you alone and happy. You know the rest." Harry said. I was very happy to hear it. I may have been more than one year late but he still loved me thats what real love is supposed to be I thought. And I could not stop myself from feeling guilty for hurting him so much. But I truly believed that he was not interested in me, thats was my only defence. "I love you too Harry. That's the reason for the break up and everything" I say.

I cannot describe the happiness in Harry's eyes as he hears those words. Its almost feels like I am seeing him smiling after a long time. He hugs me so tight that I cannot breathe properly. But I wouldn't trade this hug for the world. This is where I want to be. After some time, may be 5 minutes or 30, we break apart and he asks "So how did you come to know that I loved you?". "My dad told me today. We were discussing you and I wanted to know, its always my dad who gives up the secret and this time too he did it. And later my mom and the twins confirmed that it was true. I have loved you for a long time Harry and I thought you were not interested, thats the reason I started going out with Ron. Please don't hold it against me". I plead. But he gently lifts my chin makes me look into his eyes and says "I can never hold anything against you Hermione, even had you married Ron and had 3 kids, you would still be in my heart". He answers.

I cannot tell you how much I am moved by that simple statement. Just because they are true, I did not even know when I started crying but I had and Harry gently rubbed the tears away and hugged me till I stopped crying. Once I was calm enough he asked "How did Ron take it?". I wanted to tell him the whole story of why Ron started to date me but it will only make him upset and we can always discuss that later, now I decided on the short version. "He took it well. We have a deal now. Tomorrow in the press he will be the victim and I will be the villain and its ok for him" I answered. "And what about your parents?" He asked. "To be honest, they like you more than they like Ron. Are you going to ask questions all day or is there a part where you will ask me to be your girlfriend and kiss me?" I demand.

As soon as he told me that he loves me my mood has taken an about turn. Where I had been nervous, tensed and sad before, now I am happy and joking. Thats the power of Love, I guess. There were a lot of problems to solve, we had to give a reason for everyone to put off the wedding. And there was Ron's reaction and the whole of weasley's family reaction to deal with. With that the press would be very happy to put Ron in the victim's place and me in the manipulators place. It will be like a fourth year all over again but I could not help but be happy in this movement. I will have Harry and he will have me. May be that will be sufficient for the long run.

"Are you sure you want to be my girlfriend now Hermione? Isn't it too soon for you?" He asked. Typical Harry, I have put him through Heart break for more than one year and he is more concerned about me. "Harry I am very sure that it is not soon, if anything it is one year overdue. So even though you did not ask. Yes Harry, I will be your girlfriend". Saying this I started kissing him. And I am thinking that this is the start of my own Happily ever after.

A/N:

So thats the end of my first fanfic. I am very happy to complete it. And I would also like to apologize for the delay in posting. Had so many other commitments, so I could not come back to this one. Do read and review. And again thanks to all the people who have reviewed till now and added to the favorite story and story alert etc...

I am planning to take up a novel length H/Hr fic as my next assignment, if any of you know interesting plot or challenges please do let me know in the reviews or private message.

Once again, Thank you all.


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